The toughest thing as parent.....

Sometimes I wonder what is the toughest thing about being a parent. Besides of course losing a child, nothing could be worse than that. However there are a lot of parents out there who have had some tough experiences. One thing I can never get over or out of my mind is when Faith is having a meltdown or is screaming out of control because she cannot handle the feelings inside her body and head. Sometimes she looks at Renae and me and lets out a terror filled scream yelling " please, please help me!!!! I cannot go on living like this...or I don't feel good..or I cannot stand this...please mommy and daddy pleases do something to help me!!!! " and we know we are trying our best, however there is absolutely nothing we can do to help her at that moment. We cannot lie to her and tell her we understand how she is feeling, because we don't. We cannot try to sooth her because any touching of her skin hurts her because all of her senses are extremely sensitive when she is going through one of these "episodes". We have to just sit there and ensure she does not hurt herself or one of the other kids and until she finally passes out from complete exhaustion. At ten years old she is now old enough to communicate with us and try to explain what is happening, but usually it is not enough. However she can feel when one is coming, as can we. We have just recently noticed that her pupils will open up all the way, almost to where you do not see any of her hazel eye color. When we see her eyes like that we know an episode is coming. It just breaks my heart when my daughter begs me for help and I cannot do anything to help her....especially when I have to just stand by and watch her suffer. No kid should have to go through that.....no kid should ever have to suffer...it has to be the toughest thing I have personally ever gone through and continue to go through. Just my thought for today....Kris